Deck Review: The Ex-Lovers Tarot

Having previously reviewed a fairly intense deck, the light, healing, whimsical energy of The Ex-Lovers Tarot was very welcome! Designed and created by ex-lovers Naama Noach and Nadav Machete, the deck was a way to collaborate and reconnect after their break-up, “proving that sometimes the magic happens after the relationship is over”. Noach writes about how their separation “became a pivotal moment that propelled each of us on an individual path of discovery and growth… much like the Fool’s journey through the Tarot cards”. As someone who has maintained friendships with most of my exes (I had four of them as guests at my wedding!) the whole ethos of this deck really appealed to me. My thinking has always been that I don’t date people exclusively because I want to shag them (though don’t get me wrong, that’s important 😛), but also because I *like* them and enjoy hanging out with them. And that doesn’t change if the shagging bit doesn’t work out. Obvs it’s not always possible to maintain a friendship, particularly if one party has wronged or badly hurt the other, but I have put a lot of energy (perhaps a weird amount, I admit) into maintaining relationships with people I have been in love with. Because I still love them, even when I’m no longer *in* love with them. Even if we’ve been apart for decades. I admit it’s kinda unusual, but I also firmly believe that in this day and age, showing and honouring love is how we defeat darkness. So as soon as I read the story of how this deck came to be, I fell in love with the deck as well 💕.

“Nadav and I shared a profound connection beyond our romantic relationship; we were best friends. When we went our separate ways, I understood that whoever ended up with him would be fortunate, but I also acknowledged that it wouldn’t be me. This realisation prompted… [my discovery of] the transformative potential of Tarot cards.”

Naama Noach

The deck comes in a well-made magnetic clamshell box – quite a bulky one, with the cards inside a mount, which readers of this blog will know I’m not the biggest fan of – but it’s by no means stupidly large, so storing it on my Tarot shelves isn’t a problem. Inside there’s 79 cards (the standard 78 card deck, plus a special ‘ex-lovers’ card) and a small, paperback guidebook (in English and Hebrew) which gives an overview of the deck and a brief description of each card. The cards themselves are really good quality cardstock (350gsm art paper), reassuringly sturdy and the right amount of slipperiness.

The art style is pretty cutesy and cartoony, but not twee – it still manages to convey serious and thoughtful messages. The deck is a pretty faithful RWS clone, and taken together, it reminds me a bit of decks like This Might Hurt and Cosmic Cycles. All of this make this deck very beginner friendly, and it could easily be used to read for others as well as for self-reflection.

Each card in this deck represents a piece of our journey – the pain, the growth, the love, and the lessons we learned. Through creating these cards, we found a way to transform our experiences into something tangible and meaningful, not just for ourselves, but for others who might be going through similar journeys. We hope these cards serve as a reminder that even the most challenging endings can lead to beautiful new beginnings, and that the journey of love is never quite what we expect it to be. And offer guidance, comfort, and inspiration to all who use them, wherever they may be on their own paths.

Naama Noach

I love this slightly surreal High Priestess, who really manages to capture the liminality of the card. The boundary between the dark and the light, the sky and the water, the ying and the yang. Her body manages to somehow look like infinity, in a beautiful and terrifying way. The guidebook explains, “to find the river within, tune out the outside world and drop into your body”.

A striking Star card, and I particularly like the waters of hope flowing from her own hands like stigmata (instead of the more traditional pouring jugs): hope springs eternal indeed!

I also like the self-judgement implicit in this clever Judgement illustration (and it being the only card to also have the title reflected – in mirror writing, no less – is perfection). Our harshest critic is often ourselves, and this card speaks to the way in which we are judged for how we fall short of our own hopes and dreams, and our own expectations of ourselves (I can hear the old parental admonishment: “… and most of all, you’re letting yourself down”). The guidebook urges us to be gentle and kind with ourselves when we assess where we are at in our lives: “do this by honestly looking at your whole, imperfect, scarred, messy, and beautiful self, and know that, no matter what you’ve been through, you are worthy”.

The hungover looking figure in the Four of Cups is a neat way of depicting the message of this card: drinking away our emotions only leads to apathy. I love the literal family tree for the Ten of Pents, and the skeletal Four of Pents clutching his gold coins reminds me of the old adage: ‘you can’t take it with you’. Hoarding your wealth (in both a spiritual and literal sense) is often a fool’s errand – there’s no good in being ‘the richest man in the cemetery’.

A lovely Four of Swords here. The heart broken in the Three is returned to us, repaired. But look how tired she is. The work of healing is work, and it can be exhausting. The guidebook urges us not to rush this healing process: “trust that your wise heart knows exactly what it’s doing, and that it will open again at the right time”.

I like the way that this Seven of Swords seems to be focusing on the ways in which we trick ourselves. The sword he’s gazing at has split his reflection into different selves, like being in the hall of mirrors in a Fun House. Sometimes the lies we tell ourselves distort us until we barely recognise our own face(s). Which one is real?

Then we have the swords forming the literal bars of a prison cell in the Eight of Swords.

This Five of Wands cleverly speaks to the ‘show off’ elements of the card. Yes, juggling with the flaming batons is very impressive, but be careful not to set yourself on fire in the process – instead save your spark for where it will be most useful.

The nervous exhaustion in the Nine of Wands is almost palpable – he’s on his last match.

The Ten of Wands with his flaming log pile does a good job of illustrating that the Ace is the seed of the Ten. Here not only is the burden too great, but the spark that used to fire you up is now threatening to burn you down.

I talk a lot in readings for querents about how comfortable each King is (or is not!) on his throne, and what this says about their four personality types, so I love how the creators have depicted the King of Pents as supremely comfortable, because he is! Out of all the Kings, he is the most comfortable with the mantle of leadership; for him it is both easy – right and natural – and an honour. He is happy to mentor others and use the wealth of his experience to aid those less knowledgeable than him towards success. The King of Wands, on the other hand, still wants to be out there doing stuff, leading from the front – not sitting on a throne issuing edicts.

All the Knights are brilliantly drawn in this deck. The Knight of Swords in full superhero mode (HERE HE COMES TO SAVE THE DAAAAY!), the Knight of Wands plunging into the smoke and flames of his own drama, the hard-working Knight of Pents hammering away at his task, and the seductive Knight of Cups with his mouth like silk pillows welcoming you into your Cinderella fantasy.

This is a fun but still powerful deck, that I definitely would recommend to both experienced readers and beginners. You can buy the deck from the creators’ website for £60.99.

Call it magic, call it true
Call it magic, when I’m with you
And I just got broken, broken into two
Still I call it magic, when I’m next to you…

And if you were to ask me
After all that we’ve been through
Still believe in magic?
Oh yes I do
Oh yes I do
Yes I do
Oh yes I do
Of course I do

‘Magic’ by Coldplay (Buckland / Martin / Champion / Berryman)

.

.

.